Just Some Thoughts: Vol. 3

RJF
4 min readJun 1, 2022

So Right, So Wrong
Previously, I wrote about the Depp v. Heard case in which each celeb was suing the other for defamation. In that piece, I predicted that Depp would be the winner, and I was right. I’m not happy that I was right because the whole trial was messed up. Depp won on all of his counts against Heard, and Heard won one of her counts against Depp. One might say that Depp is the victor in this scenario, and by all accounts, he is.

I don’t know, something just doesn’t feel right about calling him a winner. Yes, he can “get his life back” now that it’s over, his name has been mostly cleared, and it seems like some wrongs were righted, but there’s just something I can’t quite put my finger on that seems askew from the whole thing. Her legal team is going to appeal, at least that’s what the speculation is right now, and the saga will continue. I wish they would both just call it a day and move on, but I doubt that will happen.

Uvalde
I can’t stop thinking about it. I’m angry. I’m brokenhearted. I’m scared. As more and more information has come out in terms of the timeline and the non-action that the police took that day, I get so enraged that I want to beat the shit out of those cops. I’ve been watching the news here and there about it, but I can’t watch too much because it just leaves me in tears. Even writing this simple paragraph has my eyes welling up. Our country is broken. Our system is broken. Our people are broken. I know there is good out there, but right now it just feels so hopeless.

Morbid Mother’s Day
My parents are taking a trip to Ireland with a group of people from their church. In the excitement of it all, they wanted my brother and I to sit down with them to go over their trust, will, and other information in case they die on their trip. Way to go, Mom and Dad, you really know how to get a party started. Of course, the only decent time to get together to talk about this stuff was before our Mother’s Day dinner.

So, as the food was cooking, we sat around their kitchen table going over all of this info, my brother and I taking our own notes, and reading through the ins and outs of what would happen in case they don’t return from their trip. It was probably the most fucked up way to spend Mother’s Day that I can remember in a really long time. The only other Mother’s Day I can think of that was sad was many years ago when my grandma burst into tears over brunch and cried, “I miss my mom!” Her mom had passed away that year, and it was her first Mother’s Day without her. I’ll never forget that, and I’ll never forget this Mother’s Day when we talked about my parent’s potential impending doom. Huzzah!

That’s All, Folks
This was my last year as the yearbook advisor for my school. It’s been a crazy, fun, stressful, and interesting six years! I was given the assignment when I wasn’t tenured, and I knew that if I took on the task, it would make me an asset in my department because all the veteran teachers knew how much work it was. My first year as the advisor was really hard; that’s the year I needed to get fitted for, and start wearing a mouth guard at night.

As the years went on, it got easier, but not by much. One of my colleagues was surprised to hear that I was passing the torch and she said, “But, you’re so good at it! You make it look so effortless.” I’m happy that I made it look effortless, but that’s only because I’ve been thrown into almost every situation you can with that role, so the trials by fire really taught me well!

I will say, for all of my griping and complaining, I will miss it. It gave me the opportunity to get to know my school, the student body, the staff, the events, and much more in a way that I never would have had I not been the advisor. The bond that I formed with those classes was more intense, more fun, and just stronger than the bonds I have with my other classes. But, it was time to move on and give the responsibility to a much younger, and newer teacher. I left and made tons of materials for her in the hopes that it will help to keep her afloat next year.

When I look back at all the books I helped to produce, I feel proud and accomplished. I also feel tired, though, and ready to move on.

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